The dictionary meaning of vulnerability is where you open yourself up to being emotionally or physically wounded. Which is probably why far too many people mask/hide their vulnerability but to be our authentic and raw selves, we must be vulnerable.
The importance of being vulnerable allows us to share those things which have hurt us and feel compassion in the act of sharing. This same vulnerability allows us to experience great new avenues of thought. It allows us to deepen the connection to ourselves and to others. It allows us to be brave enough to speak our truth.
Too often times vulnerability is seen as a sign of weakness, which is so wrong. What is weak about taking off your mask and showing who you are in all your rawness and perhaps messiness? Vulnerability is the core of all emotions and feelings. To feel is to be vulnerable. To believe vulnerability is a weakness is to believe feelings are a weakness. To hide or mask our emotional life out of fear that the costs will be too high, is to walk away from the very things that give us purpose and meaning.
Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, joy, courage, empathy, accountability and authenticity. If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful lives, vulnerability is the path. You either walk inside your story and own it, in all its truth, all its pain, all its beauty and all its emotions. Or you stand outside your story, masking who you really are, hiding your truths and spend your life hustling for your worthiness.
Avoiding how we really feel is a path so often chosen because too many self-proclaimed healers forever promote “positive vibes only”. As I’ve detailed in other blogs this is toxicity dressed up as healing because all this is doing is by-passing what needs to be healed. Distracting ourselves from dealing with any negative emotions, which in itself is a dangerous path to take. We shouldn’t avoid certain feelings and emotions, we should go within and address why we are feeling them. What are the triggers? Are we being authentic? Are we speaking our truth?
Rather than convince ourselves with positive self talk that all is well, all the while denying how we truly feel and burying any emotions that are too hard to deal with. We need to learn to help ourselves with self observation, to find our hidden truths and gain clarity. But we need to sit with it and feel that truth everywhere it needs to land first, before we can move through it and gain healing.
Uncovering the truth, the root cause of any problem and pain, you must be honest and vulnerable. We are all responsible for doing our own inner work to heal and unfortunately some will never achieve this. Some will never remove their mask and face their truth and will therefore continue to bury their emotions and feelings. Their ego will always tip the scales of balance from their inner self.
I cannot think of anything sadder than someone who hides who they truly are. Your story is your story, regardless of how beautiful, ugly, happy or painful the chapters are so far. Own your f*cking story! Not the story you think people want to hear but YOUR open, honest and authentic story of the real and vulnerable YOU.
I wear my vulnerability like a glow stick around my neck. I am open about my feelings to those they affect. If I have strong feelings about something or someone I speak them. And usually if I haven’t spoken them, they are obvious if one looks close enough. I don’t hide my emotions. Have I been wounded for being vulnerable? Absolutely! Has my vulnerability allowed for some deep and beautiful moments and connections? Most definitely! Has opening myself up and being vulnerable caused me pain? Yes of course! Would I change being so open and vulnerable? Not a chance!
What makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful. Strength of character, integrity and bravery come from vulnerability. Don’t be afraid to be who you are. There’s no room for bulls*t in being vulnerable– there is simply your naked soul standing there in all its unapologetic self. The world is so guarded and fearful of being wounded, fearful of confrontation, of rawness, of openness and honesty, yet these are a few of the most beautiful and rare characteristics.
” Vulnerability is not winning or losing, it’s the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability isn’t weakness but our greatest measure of courage”- Brene Brown