Lessons People Learn Too Late in Life

A few years ago I stumbled across an article and I remember at the time it hit me hard, as it really resonated with what I was living at the time. I reflect upon it now and it still has such meaning and holds such truth, and I would like to share it with you.

• Everything is temporary- most of us are creatures of habit and big change terrifies us. We find our comfort in life, relationships, jobs and certain roles. We like to believe in permanence and attach yourselves to the security of this. In reality everything is temporary and that’s okay. When we can detach ourselves and see each situation as it is, in that present moment, permanence becomes irrelevant. Love, happiness, joy, pain, sadness, grief- it’s all temporary at any given time. The lesson is to live in the present and experience all the emotions and feelings in that moment.

• Others treat you the way you treat yourself- this is not to say you deserve to be treated badly. I interpret this as people will treat you, how you allow them to treat you and this comes back to how you feel about yourself. If you lack boundaries and fear upsetting others, you will sometimes be treated poorly. Sometimes this is us allowing ourselves to be treated how we THINK we deserve to be treated, because we cannot see our worth. We show people how to treat us and what we will accept. The lesson here is to know your worth and don’t accept anything less than what you know you deserve.

• Beneath anger is always fear- this one really stopped me in my tracks and there’s so much truth in it. People react in negative ways with anger, jealousy, control and oftentimes this is solely driven by fear. When people cannot unpack their feelings and emotions and lack the self awareness to seek help with addressing these beliefs and behaviours they will handle situations in a negative way and often this includes projection. The lesson here is to reflect on your feelings and emotions and the way they trigger your behaviours. If you don’t know how to move forward and change, seek support to do so.

• A lifetime is not very long- aah yes, we all think there will be a never-ending cycle of tomorrows, the truth is there won’t. This realisation is not to panic and worry but rather make your moments count. Follow your soul, your passions- do whatever it is that sets you on fire. Too many people let time slip by, they want to change their life- their job, their relationship, themselves. But they wait and wait because it just never seems to be the right time. To me regret would be the saddest thing to live with, so say what you need to say, do what you need to do, be where you need to be. Live your life authentically, ensuring your dreams are the truth of your soul.

• Happiness is fleeting grab it with both hands– happiness comes from within but it also comes and goes. The reality is you need to be in an environment conducive to happiness and real happiness will only come when you are true to your heart and soul. We need to stop looking for happiness externally and instead go within and listen- listen to what our soul is saying. You will never find happiness in material items and you cannot expect another person to “make” you happy. Listen to your truth and the happiness will come.

• You played it too safe, you should have taken the risks– we love our comfort zones, because they’re bloody comfortable. But what if a life of passion, excitement and magic is waiting on the other side of that comfort zone? I used to play it safe, but I don’t anymore and I’ve found it to be an incredible ride. Try little steps and little risks and if those risks and steps are authentic and true to yourself, the rewards are beautiful.

• If you’re lucky enough to find that deep soul love, fight for it because it’s rare– there’s all kinds of love. Family love, the love we have for our children, friendship love, romantic love, but then there’s a rarer kind of love- deep soul love. I’m not sure everyone experiences this type of love in their lifetime. It surpasses romantic love and is like a tantric spiritual connection that comes from the soul. It’s rare and because the connection is often on a level rarely experienced, we don’t know how to handle it but it teaches us and takes us on a spiritual journey. Embrace it.

If we can reflect upon these and learn from these earlier, we give ourselves an amazing gift. Do the work. Do the healing. Be honest with yourself-who you are and what you truly want and let that reward you with the life you desire.