As I run, jump, skip, hurdle, dance, sing and laugh my way through the rest of the 2020 f*ckening- I get ready to embrace 2021 with excitement, anticipation and a few important things!
Gratitude for my tribe. Those amazing people who love me unconditionally in all my messiness and rawness. The one’s I speak my truth too, who never judge me. The one’s who have my back whether I’m there or not-especially when I’m not. My biggest fans. My greatest supporters. My family. My friends who became family. My tribe.
Gratitude for my blessings. I live in a place that makes me happy. I get to walk barefoot on the beach everyday. I am healthy. I am fit. I am forever learning. Growing. I am pursuing my passions. I am active. Busy. Fulfilled.
Gratitude for my lessons- Oh yes haven’t I had some of those! I’ve been kicked up the ass, slapped across the face, cut into pieces, held under water, suffocated and pushed off a cliff (metaphorically speaking). I’ve crumbled and put myself back together in a more beautiful way- the Japanese put broken things back together with gold so they are deemed more beautiful. But as hard and at times f*cked up as these lessons were, I needed to learn and grow. Pain can be such a catalyst for change.
Gratitude for my creativity– I have harnessed my gift. It was always in there, it just went into hibernation for many years. She’s now unleashed and I write what’s inside of me. I write what I have experienced. I write from my soul. I write my story. I write your story. I write the good, the happy, the bad and the sorrow. I write the pain because the ability to be vulnerable without fear of what others think is healing. It’s healing for me and it’s healing for others.
Gratitude for my passion– As I put my pieces back together, I discovered new passions and I found my purpose. I’ve always had an interest in holistic health but didn’t have the courage to step up and pursue it. Here I am pursuing it!! And kicking ass at it whilst loving every minute of it. The knowledge I have gained this year is mind-blowing and the understanding I have allows me to really make sense of people’s behaviour. The ability to really face your own darkness with brutal honesty and allowing yourself to feel that pain and heal is both terrifying and incredible.
Forgiveness of myself- Realising sometimes another’s behaviour is a mirror being held up to yourself showing you your insecurities, your triggers. Knowing that you have made mistakes and hurt others. Being f*cking brave enough to admit your mistakes and completely honest with yourself and everyone in your life. Setting yourself free from secrets which releases you from the shackles of guilt, shame and any deceit.
Forgiveness of others– Forgiving those who have hurt you and caused you pain is not easy. Feeling betrayed or just feeling what you had was not real is heartbreaking and soul destroying. But forgiveness is for yourself- to set you free. When you understand that everyone’s behaviour is a reflection of their own pain, their own insecurities and their own sh*t, you realise it’s not personal. They are on their journey and you are on yours. Forgiveness will teach you grace.
Trust & Faith
Trust & Faith in myself– That I continue to follow my path. I know I am headed in the right direction.
Trust & Faith in the universe– Knowing I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Understanding that everyone that crosses my path was meant to. Accepting that those who have chosen a different path have their own journey to walk. Believing that whatever comes next will be magic.
Trust & Faith in others- Trusting my intuition and listening and seeing the signs when people come into my life. Seeing the good in people but not putting people on pedestals. Being kind. Being generous. Loving and caring in a non-attached way and being prepared to release people in need.
Past pains and hurts have not closed my heart. My heart is huge and has so much love to give. I love myself as the whole and amazing human that I am. I love my kids with an unconditional love that can never be severed. I love my family. I love my friends. I love those who have hurt me as I know they are wounded and suffered their own pain which is why they caused me pain. I love my energy and my sense of humour. I love my life. My perfectly imperfect, messy, authentic, beautiful and sometimes crazy life.
So 2021 you better be ready! My Inner Goddess has been slowly emerging and she’s just about ready to manifest the kick ass life of her dreams and she cannot wait!!!