Better an Oops than a What If

I spent a good part of my life thinking about and wanting to do things, try things, learn things and admit I put off many things, whether due to fear or lack of faith in my own abilities. The last couple of years has seen me significantly change and grow and I am no longer shackled to fear but rather have the belief I can do anything I set my mind to!

I had dinner with two of my close friends last night and as we have been doing most Friday nights in “hibernation” we did a TikTok. This does not seem anything out of the ordinary, I mean thousands of people do TikToks, or other similar things, so why would I make mention of this? Well, I would never have had the confidence to do anything like this in the past! Mucking about with friends and family is one thing, but recording and posting those shenanigans is completely different. I must admit last nights little dance took a few goes! Introducing a third person into the mix with “dance mum” experience, required more rehearsal. We also had a wig involved which seemed to affect our “timing”. and honestly he liked wearing that wig a little too much!! Our choreography was far from perfect but our enthusiasm was on point and I’m still laughing at the many practise videos that did not make the cut!!!

I have always shrunk away at being the centre of attention, I dislike any form of public speaking immensely and having everyone’s eyes focused on me in a meeting makes me very uncomfortable. Admittedly I have improved with this over the years, however, I would still rather sit back than take the floor and really I don’t need to do that to be confident within myself and my own abilities. I have grown to love doing these TikToks because they are a HUGE amount of fun. Music, dancing, laughter, taking the absolute “p” out of ourselves and doing so with great people is liberating.

Both my friends cooked in my kitchen last night, whilst I stood back and supervised, mainly because they are much better cooks than I. They jokingly argued as to who was making the better Mongolian Dumplings, wearing Thai cooking school headscarves whilst I watched on in amusement drinking wine, because I seem to have acquired a taste for red wine in recent years. We discussed the big move our mate will undergo in a few weeks, moving thousands of kilometres away and how great it is that he made that big decision and is doing it!

It’s so easy to procrastinate and not try things for fear of failure but that’s no way to live. For me, I knew I wanted to write but put it off for so long, but no more! I’m blogging, I’m writing a book and I’ve decided to follow another dream of mine being holistic counselling. All of my new ventures are connected in that, I want to reach people in some way and ultimately help people. It’s about touching people that come into your life, whether it be a smile, laughter, a caring message or even a little inspiration. I have made a habit out of reaching out to people often, some I know are going through a tough time, others I sense might be struggling. It’s important to me to remember and acknowledge special dates and pick up the phone or send a message. Often things are not as they seem so I make the effort to check in. Giving back is such an amazing feeling and what you give, you get back tenfold.

One of the biggest things many people need to learn, is to not take themselves so seriously. You can be successful and goal orientated but find time to laugh everyday and especially laugh at yourself. Do things that scare you a little and if at first you don’t succeed keep going! Prioritise fun, one of the best gifts we can have is a sense of humour, there were very few moments my friends and I were not laughing last night and we all know laughter is medicine for the soul.

Living with regret is far more difficult than living with not trying or even failure. I respect people who “have a go” at something, try something new, stepping outside their comfort zone and simply put “having a crack”! It’s now what I’m doing each and every day and it’s sometimes scary but better an oops than a what if!!!!

Published by Michelle

After a long marriage, 2 children (now grown), a separation and embarking on a brand new life, I have realised life is always a journey. I have made mistakes, I have hurt and been hurt, I have loved and I have lost and at times I completely lost myself and forgot the Queen that I am. As women we are the nurturer, the caregiver but sometimes we underestimate the Goddess within us and my journey has made me realise that when our crown is crooked, we need to adjust it ourselves and remember the Queens that we are! This will be a blog about what I have learnt, what I am continuing to learn and how we can help each other. I will talk about all things love and life and at times this will be controversial but life and love is never black and white but varying shades of grey. We live in a judgemental society and so many of us live our lives according to the expectations of others, rather than doing or being what truly makes us happy. I hope you join me on my journey and on my quest to find that Inner Goddess and we can learn from each other and we can discuss the judgements and societal expectations that hold so many of us back. It's time to seek our inner happiness!!

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