I thought 2020 was a clusterf*ck, but I think 2021 may have won the clusterf*ck title!
As we zipped around the globe one more time, we were faced with what seems like the never-ending COVID fiasco. Lockdowns, masks, QR codes- seem to be a normal part of life, and a certain fatigue sets in. On top of that it would seem we may need to be hooked up intravenously to this vaccine! I jest of course, but seriously it’s a bizarre world we live in. And for someone who likes to live her life holistically it’s been challenging.
I’ve been thinking recently maybe I’m a rebel? I respect everyone’s choices and of course the laws, but I do like to make my own decisions based on what I think is best for me. Especially these past few years where I have worked so hard on my own healing, growth and building boundaries. But I guess this pandemic is just more lessons for all of us; and to be honest I think many are not learning! The universe and Mother Nature will not stop teaching us lessons until we learn.
So 2021 has allowed me to spend the time on working hard and almost finalising my training. It’s allowed me to focus on my writing and it’s once again reminded me of what’s truly important.
It hasn’t been without pain and heartbreak and as always I’m open and vulnerable about how I feel, because life is far too short to keep stuff buried or not follow your soul. I couldn’t attend my father in laws funeral due to COVID but I will be able to attend a memorial service in January to pay my respects and finally say goodbye. Thankfully I was able to farewell my much loved Dalmatian before we went into another covid lockdown.
It’s also been an incredible year of healing, change and growth. I have come so far and done so much and it’s with a sense of gratitude and grace that I realise I’m exactly where I need to be. I don’t fear the future anymore because I know I’ve done the work and continue to do the work to manifest my goals. Everything happens for a reason and you take the blessings and lessons from every situation because that’s how you change your life. That’s how you become the person you are meant to be.
I’ve also realised this year that the continual search for external happiness is such a sad way to live. I’ve had a lot happen in my life over the past few years and I could have easily run, but instead I stayed, I faced it and I healed it and it has made me a more courageous, resilient and authentically vulnerable person. It has also led me to exactly what I want and what nourishes my soul and I’m so glad to finally be in this space.
My hope is that everyone has learnt some lessons and used this time to reflect and heal, because we all have healing to do. To know that your happiness can only come from inside of you and no person or material item is going to bring you happiness or peace. Until we learn this we will forever search externally for something to fill our voids and that will always only ever be just a bandaid. I have learnt to leave, move on and let go of anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire because this one life that we have, should be a life that fulfils us in all the ways we need to be fulfilled. I want my soul on fire, not simmering, not smouldering but on absolute f*cking fire; living life with passion and energy every day.
So 2022, what will it bring? More covid clusterf*cks I suspect, but I will do me and use 2022 as the year that all my hardwork will come to fruition. I will be fully qualified in my counselling and coaching and I’ll have not one but two books ready to publish. But most importantly I have found me and a level of peace that brings me great joy.
As I farewell 2021 I thank my tribe (you know who you are), I thank myself for being prepared to face my own darkness and do the bloody hard work required to heal and grow and I thank the universe for having my back. I’m grateful for the lessons but more importantly I took those lessons and used them to catapult myself and now I use them to help other people.
I hope 2021 has provided you with lessons and blessings and it has made you a better version of yourself. Because ultimately that’s what we should all be striving for. Bring on 2022 kindness, compassion, gratitude and authenticity. And let’s live it with respect and less judgement, and most of all let’s live it with love.
See you on the flipside.